hallucinations and other exciting adventures

"Larium may cause restlessness, confusion, dizziness, and hallucinations." Only three people on my team are taking the drug Larium, for Malaria prevention. I happen to be one of them, and so far, I'm the only one who's hallucinated! It's kind of funny thinking back on it...but at the time, really freaky. So, I've been having trouble sleeping (apparently due to my malaria medication) and I wake up during the night, and then again at 4 or 5:00am and can't go back to sleep. Well I woke up around 4:00am today, and there was an old Indian woman standing at the foot of Bethany's bed. Ok, it wasn't really an old woman, but I could've sworn that the towel and sheet hanging on that hook was a woman. I was so freaked out. The fans were blowing, so it looked like she was standing there scratching her back or something. I laid there for an hour and a half completely believing that a woman from the streets had wandered into our room and was just standing there looking at us. So, apparently those Larium side effects are no joke...quite an experience!

The past three days from 8am-noon I have been working with other volunteers at one of Mother Teresa's home: Prem Dan. I have been having so much fun hanging out with these women, smiling at them, helping them go to the bathroom, feeding them, rubbing their backs...I love it. And it's been fun to be able to come back to the same women and have them recognize me, it's so cute:) Today I sat down by a woman who I hadn't talked with yet. She was laying down on her cot and I started rubbing her back. Then she put her arm around my neck, pulled me close to her and kissed my cheek! She probably kissed me 5 or 6 times...and said "Tomorrow? Morning?" and I knew she wanted to see me again:) It was just so precious and made my day!

This is where all the women sit for their meals. There are benches along the walls and in the middle so all the women cram in this long hallway area to eat.

Last night Father Abello came to talk to our group at the YWCA, where we're staying in Kolkata. He was kind of interesting, I mean he knew Mother Teresa, and so that was amazing to hear about her! But, he rambled...a lot...and it was really hard to keep track of where he was going. And we were all SO tired as we listened to him from 7-9:45pm. That time of night is killer, because we've all had such LONG days. I really wanted to get more of what he was saying, but I couldn't stay awake...oh man, it was tough:)

The past couple days have been a bit odd for me. I feel like I'm getting used to how things are here, not a lot shocks me or makes me really sad when I see it. There is so much poverty and gross things everywhere, and I feel like I'm not really affected by it. And I'm also just really confused. I don't know what I think about things...I guess still processing and figuring out what life is like in India. It's also weird, because part of me just wants to live WAY more simply...giving away what I don't need, like how Mother Teresa lived her life. Seeing how people are living here, makes me realize how much I don't need in my life. But then, there's also the part of me, that wants to go shopping for sarees or purses or whatever, because everything is just so amazing here and I love the style! So, I guess I'm kind of struggling with that...wondering how to react to what I see, and how it will change me. I know these weeks in India are going to change my life forever. I'm already thinking about things differently and realizing how I'm really drawn to this place, to these people. I feel really overwhelmed sometimes, I try to figure out what I think about everything, try to understand how I'm feeling, and I just get more confused:) I feel like there are so many emotions going on in me...happiness, love, sadness, confusion, joy, overwhelmed...sometimes I just feel like crying because of what I see, or else I just want to laugh and smile. Hmm...so anyway, it's just weird. But I'm so happy...I know that much. I love India. I love the kids. I love the old women. (even hallucinations of them...haha) I love my team. I love God. Life is so good:)